Hi.

My name is Susan and I live in North Carolina.
I used to smoke cigarettes and have some understanding of what powerful addiction is like. (I also am an aspiring raw-foodist and believe that meat and cooked foods are also addictions.)
I have sought this tribe because my boyfriend is a crack/coke addict. I feel sorry for him and have to be conscious of his ailment. I do not want to leave him because we make a good couple and I want to have a family with him, travel, everything. I wish that the two of us could move to someplace far away to heal his addiction but at the same time I know that an addict will find what he or she is craving no matter what the circumstances. anyway, my boyfriend has been clean for a while but I have felt really distanced from him recently. last night I initiated a "we don't communicate" conversation and from what he said (or didn't say) I could make the interpretation that he has been using again.
(out of the ordinary things like blaming, disorderly thoughts, incorrect statements that seemed provoking of conflict - one thing I actually learned from him is that an addict will try to create space between him or herself and the people he or she loves in order to have a reason to go use.)
so, I am surviving and have a full life outside of him but it makes me sad that we aren't connecting right now. I hope it ends soon - only he can determine that - the best I can do is to be present in some way and not ever put money in his hands or engage in an argument that I suspect is instigated to
promote him gratifying his addiction.

okay, I've said enough. thanks for listening.

Howdy! I'm a grateful recovering dually-diagnosed addict. Please feel free to call me either Chris or fugi- I answer to both IRL as well as online. Just about anything a person might want to know about me is already somewhere in the electronic universe. Still got questions? Ask away- I usually give genuine inquries a reply. I'm a firm believer that we're only as sick as our secrets. I have damned few any more- thank goodness!!! Fair warning, though... don't ask me for advice or opinions unless you want an honest answer! ;oD

Hi Im Daniel, and used to have everything going for me. I was an investor had about 20 000 dollars in my account by the time I was 19 and life was looking good. Now I have nothing left and am still struggling with my addictions to mainly coke but if thats not around anything will do anything. I have gotten to the point now where I can and will say no when Im sober but when Im drunk I just dont care. I think I have to quit drinking as well or I'll never do it. My life and future depends on it.